1. Why did the creeper pay for his groceries with a check?

Because his cash always blows up.

2. What do you get if you cross a squid with a creeper?

A swimming pool full of ink!

3. What’s an Enderman’s favorite place to eat out?

Anywhere he can take out.

4. What do you get when you cross a snow golem with a vampire?

Frostbite.

5. What did the Minecraft turkey say?

“Cobble, cobble, cobble!”

6. What’s a ghast’s favorite country?

The Nether-lands.

7. Why don’t creepers use libraries?

They have a history of blowing up the volumes.

8. Why don’t Minecraft zombies make good secret agents?

They’re too easy to read.

9. What’s Minecraft’s favorite movie?

Block-buster.

10. Why don’t Minecraft players go to bars?

They can’t find the “craft” beer.

11. What do you call a creeper in a hammock?

A swing bomb.

12. Why did the zombie go to school?

To improve his “dead”ucation.

13. What’s a zombie’s favorite thing to borrow?

A cup of sugar… and maybe a brain.

14. Why did the Minecraft player eat candles?

He wanted a light snack.

15. What do you get if you pour hot water down a rabbit hole in Minecraft?

A hot cross bunny.

16. Why did the Ender Dragon fail at comedy?

His jokes always dragon.

17. What’s a skeleton’s favorite snack?

Spare ribs.

18. What happens when you leave a cake out in Minecraft?

It becomes a block cake.

19. Why did the skeleton bring a mop to the party?

He wanted to “sweep” everyone off their feet!

20. Why did the Enderman never finish his book?

Because he always teleports to the end!

21. What did the villager use to call his friend?

A block-phone.

22. What do you get when you cross a villager with a comedian?

Someone who knows how to craft a joke.

23. How do you stop a Minecraft skeleton from attacking you?

Take a “rib” out of his playbook.

24. What do you get when you cross an ocelot and a creeper?

An explosion of fur.

25. How do you make a witch itch?

Take away the ‘w’.

26. What do you get if you cross a creeper with a duck?

A bird that will put a feather in your cap… and then explode!

27. Why was the skeleton using a pickaxe?

He didn’t have the guts to use a shovel.

28. What kind of music do Minecraft parrots like?

Wing beats.

29. Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea-weed!

30. Why are there no cars in Minecraft?

Because the streets are always blocked.

31. Why don’t Endermen eat clowns?

Because they taste funny.

32. What’s an Enderman’s favorite activity?

Staring contests.

33. Why can’t skeletons play church music?

Because they can’t handle the organ.

34. How does a creeper sing lullabies?

With a lot of soul and a bang!

35. What do you call an aggressive Minecraft player?

A mine-field.

36. Why don’t Endermen make good poets?

Because they always skip to the end.

37. What’s the skeleton’s favorite band?

The Grateful Dead.

38. Why did the Enderman never use a door?

He always teleported past it.

39. Why did the creeper start a gardening service?

Because he was great at making plants grow faster.

40. Why do creepers hate sunlight?

It makes them feel light-headed.

41. What do you call a group of musical creepers?

A boombox.

42. Why did the Minecraft player take a cookie to bed?

For sweet dreams.

43. What’s a Minecraft cow’s favorite TV show?

Moo-dern Family.

44. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?

They don’t have the guts.

45. Why did the creeper get a job at the bakery?

He was great at making things rise!

46. What do you get when you cross a dirt block with a torch?

A night light.

47. Why don’t skeletons play music in church?

They have no organ to play.

48. How do you throw a party in Minecraft?

You have to plan a block party.

49. Why did the Minecraft player bring a pickaxe to the quiz?

He thought there would be a minefield of questions.

50. What do you call a creeper in a suit?

Mr. Explodes-ive Personality.

51. Why can’t you tease Endermen?

Because they always take things personally.

52. How does Steve chop down trees with his fists?

How wood I know?

53. What’s a skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?

The trom-bone.

54. How does a creeper blow up a party?

He just comes in and has a blast!

55. What do you call a very small valentine?

A valen-tiny, like the ones in Minecraft!

56. Why do Creepers hiss?

Because they can’t whistle.

57. How do you make a small fortune in Minecraft?

Start with a large fortune and buy some dynamite.

58. Why was the mushroom invited to all the Minecraft parties?

Because he’s a fungi!

59. What do you call a Minecraft joke that doesn’t work out?

A block-buster.

60. Why was the Minecraft player always calm?

Because he knew how to block out the stress.

61. What did the creeper say to his date?

“You’ve got a ssssmokin’ body!”

62. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room?

The living room.

63. What do you get if you cross a skeleton with a famous detective?

Sherlock Bones.

64. Why did the villager never go to the movie?

It wasn’t rated “E” for Everyone.

65. How does a Minecraft player stay healthy?

By avoiding the creepers and eating plenty of apples.

66. What did Steve say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?

“You really strike a chord with me.”

67. Why was the creeper a good drummer?

Because he had perfect timing for the “boom.”

68. Why do players never get lonely in Minecraft?

Because they have plenty of “blocks” for friends!

69. Why did the creeper cross the road?

To get to the other sssside.

70. Why don’t blazes ever make good baseball players?

Because they keep hitting foul balls!

71. Why was the Minecraft book boring?

Because it had too many blocks.

72. What’s a Minecraft player’s favorite button on the keyboard?

The “space” bar.

73. Why did the villager break up with the creeper?

She wanted someone more down-to-earth.

74. What do Minecraft players eat for breakfast?

Pixels.

75. What do you call a Minecraft story that isn’t true?

A block of lies.

76. What’s a Creeper’s favorite food?

Ssssssalad.

77. What did Steve say to his girlfriend?

“I dig you.”

78. What happens when you exhaust a Minecraft sheep?

It runs out of wool-power.

79. Why don’t Ghasts ever lie?

Because you can see right through them.

80. What did the pig say when someone touched its tail?

That’s “swine”!

81. How do you make a Minecraft boat move faster?

Add a creeper.

82. What’s a Creeper’s favorite subject in school?

Hissssstory.

83. Why did the creeper give up on his job?

He couldn’t handle the pressure.

84. Why did the Minecraft player go to therapy?

To help sort out his “blocks”.

85. What’s a ghast’s favorite place to shop?

Blast Buy.

86. What did the ocean say to the beach in Minecraft?

Nothing, it just waved.

87. Why did the villager keep checking his watch?

He had a block schedule.

88. Why did the Minecraft player bring a ladder to the bar?

Because the drinks were on the house.

89. What do Minecraft zombies eat?

Brrrrrainsss.