1. Why do race cars always stay at the front?
They hate being backed up.
2. What’s a race car’s favorite type of tree?
A rubber tree, for the tires.
3. How do you greet a race car driver?
“Pleased to engine-meet you!”
4. What’s a race car’s least favorite weather?
Brake rain.
5. Why do race cars never sleep?
They keep racing in their dreams!
6. Why do race cars make good pets?
They’re great at chasing.
7. What did the race car say on Valentine’s Day?
“You drive me crazy!”
8. What kind of car races are held at night?
Star sprints!
9. Why don’t race cars write tests?
They always finish too quickly!
10. Why did the race car eat fast food?
It needed a pit stop meal.
11. What do race cars do when they get home?
Park their butts.
12. Why do race cars hate shopping?
Too many slow checkouts.
13. Why did the race car join the orchestra?
It had great timing.
14. Why did the race car go to the library?
It needed to check out the competition.
15. Why did the race car go to therapy?
It had too many breakdowns.
16. What do race cars wear to the beach?
A brake-ini.
17. Why don’t race cars ever freeze in winter?
They’ve got heated competitions.
18. How do you stop a race car?
Unleash the chicken cross the road!
19. Why do race cars love spring?
For the fast blooming.
20. Why do race cars go to school?
To get a higher education.
21. What’s a race car’s favorite subject?
Geography—for all the maps.
22. What did the race car say to its mechanic?
“You auto know better!”
23. Why do race cars make terrible thieves?
Too much exhaust evidence.
24. What did the race car say to the other race car?
Wanna burn some rubber?
25. Why did the race car driver bring string to the track?
To tie up the race.
26. What do you call a group of race cars?
A fast company.
27. What’s a race car’s favorite part of the newspaper?
The comics, for a quick laugh.
28. What do race cars do in their free time?
They rally around.
29. What’s a race car’s favorite holiday?
New Year’s Eve, for the countdown.
30. What’s a race car’s life goal?
To complete the circle.
31. How do race cars eat their food?
Fast and furiously.
32. What did the race car say after the race?
“That was wheely fun!”
33. What did the race car do at the mall?
It quickly found a parking spot.
34. What do you get when you cross a race car with a potato?
A crash potato!
35. What’s a race car’s favorite type of pasta?
Fast-uccine.
36. What do race car drivers drink?
Acceler-ade.
37. What’s a race car’s favorite sport?
Drag racing.
38. What’s a race car’s favorite kind of shoes?
Sneakers, for extra grip.
39. How do race cars stay in touch?
They exchange contact patches.
40. Why are race cars bad at hide and seek?
They always come out in the lead.
41. Why did the race car visit the moon?
To experience less gravity on its turns.
42. What’s a race car’s favorite type of music?
Brake-beat!
43. Why don’t race cars use bookmarks?
Because they always try to finish first!
44. Why did the race car use suntan lotion?
To avoid burning out.
45. Why do race cars have GPS?
So they don’t get lost on their victory laps!
46. What do race cars think about traffic lights?
They find them quite stopping.
47. How do race cars greet each other?
“Nice to meet you, let’s roll!”
48. Why do race cars have rearview mirrors?
To see the competition they’ve left behind.
49. Why did the race car write a book?
Because it had a story with many twists and turns.
50. What do you call a sleepy race car?
A yawnmobile.
51. Why did the race car get kicked out of class?
It passed everyone!
52. Why did the race car go to yoga?
To improve its flexibility on the track.
53. How do you know a race car is excited?
Its engine starts revving.
54. Why did the race car go to the party?
To brake-dance.
55. Why are race cars so good at math?
Because they know how to accelerate past their problems.
56. What do you call a race car that tells jokes?
A punny car.
57. What’s a race car’s favorite animal?
A cheetah, for its speed.
58. What’s a race car’s favorite dance?
The Indy 500 Slide.
59. What did the old race car say?
“I’m too tired.”
60. What happens when a race car gets a flat tire?
It retires.
61. Why did the race car get a job?
To make ends meet.
62. What do you call a race car that doesn’t need gas?
An elec-track car.
63. Why did the race car read a book?
To gear up for the next race.
64. What’s a race car’s favorite meal?
Fast food.
65. Why do race cars love smart people?
They’re full of bright ideas on the track!
66. Why was the race car always in school?
Because it had a lot of class!
67. What do you call an honest race car driver?
A fair wheeler.
68. Why are race cars so fit?
They always burn rubber.
69. What’s a race car’s favorite part of a joke?
The punch-line.
70. Why don’t race cars write letters?
They prefer fast communication.
71. What’s a race car’s favorite drink?
High octane.
72. What do you do with a sick race car?
Give it car-diac arrest.
73. Why did the race car go to the shrink?
It had an identity crisis—am I a car or a racer?
74. What do you call a race car that never stops?
Perpetual motion.
75. Why don’t race cars play cards?
Too many cheetahs on the track!
76. Why did the race car driver break up with the track?
He couldn’t handle the curves.
77. Why did the race car go to school?
To improve its track record.
78. Why don’t race cars talk about their feelings?
They bottle up their exhaust.
79. What kind of flowers do race cars give?
Speedy-odendrons!
80. How do you start a race car diet?
Remove the spare tire.
81. What’s a race car’s favorite game?
Fuel and Seek.
82. What did the race car do when it retired?
It took a brake.
83. What did the race car do when it was angry?
Blew off some steam.
84. What do you call a race car that doesn’t fart?
A private car!
85. How do race car drivers stay cool?
They keep their fans close!
86. Why don’t race cars ever get lost?
They follow the track!
87. What’s a race car’s favorite day of the week?
Race day!
88. Why did the race car sit in meditation?
To find its inner piece.
89. Why do race car drivers make terrible comedians?
They always take the fastest route to the punchline!